7 Common Phrases Dads Say That Might Mean More Than They Realize
Growing up, you might have noticed certain things your dad says that just don’t sit right. Maybe you brushed them off, or maybe they made you feel a bit off-balance.
Some of these everyday phrases can quietly chip away at your confidence. They might even make you second-guess your feelings or memories.
Let’s take a closer look at some of these phrases and why they can be more harmful than they seem.
“You’re just being too sensitive.”
Hearing “You’re just being too sensitive” can sting. It can make you wonder if your feelings are wrong or not important.
This phrase often leads you to keep things bottled up. You might start believing your emotions don’t matter.
If you hear this a lot, it’s easy to lose trust in your own reactions. Remember, your feelings are real and they deserve respect.
“I never said that happened.”
When your dad says, “I never said that happened,” it can leave you feeling unsettled. You might remember something clearly, but he denies it.
This can make you start to doubt your own memory. It’s a way of telling you that your experiences might not be real.
If you hear this often, you may start to question yourself. Your memories deserve to be heard and respected.
You should feel safe expressing what you remember. No one should make you feel like you’re imagining things.
You’re remembering it wrong.
Being told, “You’re remembering it wrong,” can be really disorienting. It puts your memories and experiences into question.
Sometimes, you remember something vividly, but this phrase makes you second-guess yourself. Over time, it can chip away at your confidence.
Gaslighting often shows up with phrases like this. It’s okay to trust your memory and talk to someone you trust if you feel confused.
Stop overreacting.
“Stop overreacting” is something many of us have heard. It can make you feel like your emotions are too much or not valid.
When you hear this, you might start to bottle things up. Especially if you have ADHD, it can be even more hurtful because your feelings are part of who you are.
It’s okay to express yourself and feel upset sometimes. You don’t have to change your feelings just because someone else doesn’t understand.
Hearing this phrase can make it harder to trust your own emotions. You deserve to be heard without being told your feelings aren’t real or serious.
It’s all in your head.
When your dad says, “It’s all in your head,” it can feel like he’s saying your feelings or experiences aren’t real. This phrase can make you start to doubt what you remember or how you feel.
You might wonder if you’re making things up or just being dramatic. That kind of self-doubt can linger.
This is a common gaslighting phrase. It tries to shift blame onto you by making you question your own thoughts and emotions.
If you hear this a lot, it’s okay to trust your feelings. Your thoughts matter, and they deserve to be heard.
Recognizing phrases like this can help you set boundaries and protect your mental well-being.
“I was only joking, don’t take it seriously.”
Hearing, “I was only joking, don’t take it seriously,” might seem harmless at first. But it can make you feel like your feelings are being brushed aside.
If something said as a joke hurts you, this phrase can shut down your chance to talk about it. You may start to think your feelings aren’t important.
You deserve to have your feelings heard, even if a joke was involved. If a comment bothers you, it’s okay to say so.
A real apology or understanding is better than brushing off your feelings with a joke.
You’re making things up.
When your dad says, “You’re making things up,” it can be confusing and hurtful. It might seem like he doesn’t believe you at all.
This is a common gaslighting phrase used to dismiss your experience. You might start doubting your memory or feelings.
When someone says this, they are trying to avoid responsibility. You deserve to have your feelings and memories respected.
If you hear this a lot, it can make you feel unsure about yourself. Your feelings and experiences are real and valid.
Learning to recognize phrases like “You’re making things up” helps you protect your confidence. You can trust what you know to be true.
Understanding Gaslighting in Parent-Child Relationships
Gaslighting can quietly change how you see yourself and your experiences. When it comes from a parent, it can leave deep marks on your confidence and trust in your own feelings.
Knowing what gaslighting looks like and how it works helps you spot it and protect yourself.
What Is Gaslighting?
Gaslighting is a type of emotional manipulation. It happens when someone tries to make you question what you remember, feel, or believe.
In parent-child relationships, this means a parent might deny your feelings or experiences, making you doubt yourself.
Examples include phrases like “You’re too sensitive” or “That never happened.” These are not just dismissive comments; they are tools to control and confuse you.
Gaslighting can seem subtle but still harms your ability to trust your own mind.
How Gaslighting Affects Children
When a parent gaslights you, it can lower your self-esteem. You might start to think your feelings aren’t valid or that you’re always wrong.
This can make it hard to speak up or trust others. Gaslighting also affects how you see the world.
You might feel confused about what’s true or false. Over time, this makes it harder to make decisions or hold your ground in tough situations.
It can even affect your mental health by causing anxiety or self-doubt.
Recognizing Gaslighting Behavior
Gaslighting often uses common phrases that sound normal but damage your sense of reality. Here are a few examples:
- “You’re remembering it wrong.”
- “You’re overreacting.”
- “I never said that.”
These statements are meant to make you second-guess yourself. If you notice your parent often dismisses your feelings, changes stories, or blames you unfairly, those are signs of gaslighting.
Recognizing these behaviors is the first step in protecting yourself and your mental well-being. You deserve to have your truth heard.
Healthier Communication Alternatives
Choosing your words carefully can help build trust and understanding between you and your child.
When you offer support and respect, you encourage your child to share their feelings honestly and feel valued.
Encouraging Emotional Honesty
Instead of dismissing your child’s feelings, invite them to explain what they’re going through. You can say things like, “Tell me more about how you feel,” or “I’m here to listen.”
This helps your child feel safe and understood. When kids share emotions without fear of judgment, they learn to trust you more.
If your child seems upset, try to validate their experience. For example, say, “It sounds like that really bothered you,” rather than telling them they are overreacting.
This shows that you respect their feelings and helps them learn to express emotions clearly.
Promoting Mutual Respect
Conversations with kids can get heated fast, especially when everyone feels misunderstood. Using respectful language helps keep things on track and makes it easier to work through disagreements.
Try swapping out phrases that sound critical for ones that focus on working together. For example, instead of saying, “You never listen,” try, “Let’s figure out how we can communicate better.” This simple change can make a big difference in how your child responds.
It also helps to show the respect you hope to receive. Speak calmly, and let your child finish their thoughts before you respond.
You might say, “I see why you feel that way,” to show you’re listening. Little shifts like these can strengthen your relationship and make honest conversations possible.
